Sexy Feast: Kisaku Will Make You Want to Swallow

kisaku_shirako_640_4532I’m endlessly asked to recommend the best sushi restaurant in Seattle. Along with Sushi Kappo Tamura (featured in a previous Sexy Feast about head), I heartily recommend Kisaku in Tangletown. The fish is fabulous, there’s a neighborhood feeling, and the quality to price is probably the best in the Seattle area. My favorite item is the delicious hotate kombu jime (kelp-marinated scallop). Place that order, and Chef Nakano will think I sent you!

Even better, order omakase, putting yourself in the hands of the chef. If you’re lucky, Nakano-san will serve you shirako. This cod milt is a delicacy; the lobe-like pieces have a creamy, custardy texture like oceanic sweetbreads or brains, but even better. While some like their shirako tempura-ed, I prefer mine with a little ponzu sauce, which adds a slight punch of citrusy tanginess.

So what does Kisaku’s shirako teach us about sex?

It’s all about understanding and enjoying sperm.

Shirako means “white children” in Japanese. Indeed, milt is the seminal fluid of fish, in this case cod. (Stay with me…it’s still a delicacy.) We’re talking sperm sac. We’re talking semen.

Note: It doesn’t “make” you anything if you eat and enjoy shirako. And what’s not to like? It melts in your mouth, like buttah.

Now I’m not saying we should be eating the “white children” of humans, though if you believe in the book Natural Harvest, there’s great potential in that possibility:

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen.

We shouldn’t be freaked out about semen. Since it’s such a misunderstood thing, here are some facts:

  • The average ejaculate varies in size, but figure an average of about one teaspoon of semen.
  • About 90 percent of semen is water, with the rest other nutrients (enzymes, vitamins, minerals, etc.).
  • Sperm is only a small component of what’s in semen.
  • Unejaculated sperm are absorbed back into the body.
  • Ejaculation averages a distance of seven to ten inches, but can be three feet or more.
  • Average speed at ejaculation can reach about 30 miles per hour–but sperm have no sense of direction (and don’t stop to ask directions).
  • Sperm can live up to five days inside a woman’s body–think about that in terms of pregnancy risk.
  • Healthy men produce 70-150 million sperm per day.
  • A healthy diet contributes to a high sperm count, as does exercise, sleep, and avoiding tobacco and alcohol.
  • A man’s diet can affect the flavor or his semen. Watch out for asparagus.

As for the last point, you might consider eating kiwi or pineapple to sweeten your bodily fluids. Or, thinking back to Kisaku, maybe ponzu is a good idea.

First published in Seattle Weekly’s Voracious on April 19, 2012.



No comments yet.

Leave a Reply